Dan Bern - Tiger Woods

Zapamiętaj tekst i zaśpiewaj sam

Dan Bern - Tiger Woods

Album:

I got big balls
Big ol' balls
Big as grapefruits
Big as pumpkins
Yes sir, yes sir
And on my really good days
They swell to the size of small dogs
My balls are as big as small dogs

Well, it ain't braggin' if it's true
Yes sir, yes sir
It ain't braggin' if it's true
Muhammad Ali said that
Back when he was a young man
Back when he was Cassius Clay
Before he fought too many fights
And left his brain inside the ring

And sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods
Sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods

I got a friend whose goal in life
Was to one day go down on Madonna
That's all he wanted
That was all
To one day go down on Madonna
And when my friend was thirty-four
He got his wish in Rome one night
He got to go down on Madonna
In Rome one night in some hotel
And ever since he's been depressed
'Cause life is shit from here on in
And all our friends just shake their heads
And say too soon, too soon, too soon
He went down on Madonna too soon
Too young, too young, too soon, too soon

And it ain't braggin' if it's true
Yes sir, yes sir
It ain't braggin' if it's true
Muhammad Ali said that
Back when he was Cassius Clay
Before he fought too many fights
And left his brain inside the ring

And sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods
Sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods

If certain girls don't look at you
It means that they like you a lot
If other girls don't look at you
It just means they're ignoring you
How can you know, how can you know?
Which is which, who's doing what?
I guess that you can ask 'em
Which one are you baby?
Do you like me or are you ignoring me?
Do you like me or are you ignoring me?
Do you like me or are you ignoring me?
And all you need to do that
Is one good pair of big balls
Balls as big as grapefruits
Balls as big as pumpkins
Balls as big as mine

But even though my balls are big
Sometimes I wish they were bigger
Even bigger
Big as the wheels on tractors
Big as the golden arches
Big as the Golden Gate Bridge
Big as the state of Kansas
Big as Mars and Jupiter
Big as the swing of Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods


  • Qualis vir, talis oratio - jaki mąż, taka mowa.
  • Długi język ma krótkie nogi. Krzysztof Mętrak
  • Nie pytam się, jakie są prawa, ale jacy są sędziowie. Charles Louis Montesquieu
Wiadomości ze światowego rynku muzycznego
  • MUDVAYNE SLAM RADIO WITH THEIR FASTEST-RISING SINGLE YET
    "DO WHAT YOU DO" IS #1 MOST ADDED AT ACTIVE ROCK AND #2 MOST ADDED AT MODERN ROCK BAND OPENS UP TICKET SALES AT ALL OUTLETS (Monday, September 29) AND PARTNERS WITH BESTBUY TO ADD A FREE LIVE WEBCAST OF THEIR CONCERT TO FAN CLUB MEMBERS MUDVAYNE--one of the most creative and distinctive bands in the aggressive music world with sales exceeding 5 million units worldwide--have slammed onto the charts with "Do What You Do," the fastest-rising single of their career. Garnering over 75 radio adds out of the box--in the first 36 hours the track became available this week--the song is #1 most added at the Active Rock chart and #2 most added at Modern Rock.  As the band prepare to release THE NEW GAME--their first studio album in three years, due out November 18 via Epic Records--the band is working even harder to get the best possible deal directly to their fans in light of the tough economy by opening up ticket sales of their upcoming tour to all outlets and partnering with Best Buy to add a free live web cast of their concert to fan club members who pre-order the album at bestbuy.com/mudvayne.  "We want fans that cannot afford to see us live or that live outside our tour markets to still get the benefits of our ‘The Album Is The TicketTM' program," says singer Chad Gray, "and by adding the live webcast and releasing ticket sales to the general public, we are now able to offer fans even more value and options for their money in this rough financial time." The concert webcast will be from one of the tour stops (TBA) on the first leg of "The New Game Tour 2008."  Meanwhile, all tickets will be released at all outlets by Monday, September 29th. All current ‘The Album Is The Ticket' members are entitled to a free meet & greet at their selected show. The current dates for "The New Game Tour 2008" are as follows.  Note: All dates subject to change. DATE            CITY                VENUE Tue    10/28        El Paso, TX            El Paso County Coliseum Thu    10/30        Corpus Christi, TX        The Pavilion At Concrete Fri    10/31        Grand Prairie, TX        Nokia Live Sat    11/1        San Antonio, TX        Sunset Station Mon    11/3        Houston, TX            Warehouse Live Wed    11/5        Tulsa, OK            Cain's Ballroom Fri    11/7        Oklahoma City, OK        Bricktown Events Center Sat    11/8        Albuquerque, NM        Albuquerque Convention Center Sun    11/9        Tempe, AZ            The Marquee Theatre Tue    11/11        Los Angeles, CA        The Wiltern Wed    11/12        Las Vegas, NV        The Joint Fri    11/14        San Francisco, CA        The Grand Ballroom Sat    11/15        Portland, OR            Roseland Theatre Mon    11/17        Seattle, WA            Showbox SoDo Wed    11/19        Spokane, WA            The Knitting Factory Concert Hall Fri    11/21        Denver, CO            The Fillmore Auditorium Sat    11/22        Kansas City, MO        Uptown Theatre Mon    11/24        Wichita, KS            The Cotillion Tue    11/25        St Louis, MO            The Pageant Wed    11/26        East Peoria, IL        East Peoria Event Center Fri    11/28        Des Moines, IA        Val Air Ballroom Sat    11/29        Maplewood, MN        The Myth Mon    12/1        Milwaukee, WI            The Eagles Ballroom Tue    12/4        Chicago, IL            House of Blues Fri    12/5        Detroit, MI            The Fillmore Detroit Sat    12/6        Grand Rapids, MI        The Orbit Room Mon    12/8        Cincinnati, OH            Bogart's Tue    12/9        Columbus, OH        LC Pavilion Thu    12/11        Baltimore, MD            Rams Head Live! Fri    12/12        Philadelphia, PA        The Electric Factory Sat    12/13        Worcester, MA        The Palladium Tue    12/16        New York, NY            Roseland Ballroom Wed    12/17        Norfolk, VA            The Norva Fri    12/19        Atlanta, GA            Tabernacle Sat    12/20        Lake Buena Vista, FL        House of Blues
  • True Colors Live EP!
    Get the True Colors Live EP!
  • Sneak Peak of my new video "Long Distance"!
    Hey Stars! I hope you all are as excited about my video for "Long Distance" as I am! Here's a sneak peek from Rap Up!
  • Może Bóg kiedyś skieruje ich umyśl do poznania prawdy i opamiętawszy się, wyzwolą się z sideł diabla, który ich trzyma jak jeńców według swojej woli. 2 Tym 2:25-26
  • U ludzi marne słowo jest także potęgą. Krasiński Zygmunt
  • Praca jest źródłem cnót. Johann Gottfried Herder